Two Great Comeback Responses of the Year

TWO GREAT COMEBACK RESPONSES OF THE YEAR

 



If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the police officer’s credibility…

Q:  ‘Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?’   
A:   ‘No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away.’ 

Q:   ‘Officer, who provided this description?’   
A:   ‘The officer who responded to the scene.’ 

Q:   ‘A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?’
A:   ‘Yes, sir. With my life.’ 

Q:   ‘With your life? Let me ask you this then, officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily  duties?’
A:   ‘Yes sir, we do!’

Q:   ‘And do you have a locker in the room?’   
A:   ‘Yes sir, I do.’

Q:  ‘And do you have a lock on your locker?’
A:   ‘Yes sir.’ 

Q:   ‘Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?’


A:   ‘You see, sir, we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room.’

The courtroom EXPLODED with laughter, and a prompt recess was called. The officer on the stand has been nominated for this year’s ‘Best Comeback’ line —  and we think he’ll win.

    Now We  KnoWhy He Waa General…  



In a recent interview, General Norman Schwarzkopf was asked if he thought there was room for forgiveness toward the people who have harbored and abetted the terrorists who perpetrated the 9/11 attacks on America. His answer was classic Schwarzkopf. 

The General said,  “I believe that forgiving them is God’s function.  Our job is to arrange the meeting.”

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Hotline

最怕的就是要用 hotline 去查詢的,因為儘管你已作好心理準備,仍然會被那種繁複的程序後仍要無了期的等候所激怒。

今早為要在互聯網上去做一個預約服務,但因中間出現了些問題,只好硬着頭皮去致電 hotline。等了很久的政府一站通解笞不了我的問題,最後給了知相關部門的 hotline 我。線路永遠是繁忙的,幸好我有鍥而不捨的精神,等了不知多少分鐘才取得對話。

查詢之所以那麼頻繁是因為在制度中有很多不明確的地方,儘管我們較年青的可以利用五聯網,但仍省不了查詢的數目。作為一個有意改善服務的政府,希望他們能統計一下查詢的內容,在根本的問題上多加著手,我們才可享受到真正的服務。

 

An unusual friendship

An unusual friendship

They make an unlikely trio, but Baloo the bear, Leo the lion and Shere Khan the tiger have forged an unusually strong bond. Considering that they would be mortal enemies if they ever were to meet in the wild, it is stunning to see their unique and genuine friendship in these intimate pictures. Rescued eight years ago during a police drugs raid in Atlanta , Georgia , the three friends were only cubs at the time at barely two months old. 

Baloo the bear, Leo the lion and Shere Khan the tiger

Jungle japes: Shere Khan the tiger, Leo the lion and Baloo the bear all live together in a specially-built enclosure at Noah’s Ark Animal Rescue Centre, in Georgia , USA

 

They had been kept as status symbol pets by the drug barons.  Delivered to the Noah’s Ark Animal Rescue Centre in Locust Grove , Georgia , the decision was made to keep the youngsters together, because of their budding rapport.  ‘We could have separated them, but since they came as a kind of family, the zoo decided to keep them together,’ said Diane Smith, assistant director of Noah’s Ark.  ‘To our knowledge, this is the only place where you’ll find this combination of animals together.’  Living with the zoo’s founders for the past eight years, Shere Khan, Baloo and Leo have now moved to a purpose-built habitat were the US public can now witness first hand their touching relationships.

Baloo the bear, Leo the lion and Shere Khan the tiger

Best friends: The three beasts have been kept together since they were rescued from drug barons when they were just two months old. 

 

‘We didn’t have the money to move them at first,’ said Diane.  ‘Now their habitat is sorted and they have been moved away from the children’s zoo areas where the public couldn’t really get a good look.  ‘It is possible to see Baloo, who is a 1000lb bear, Shere Khan, a 350lb tiger and Leo, who is also 350lbs, messing around like brothers.

‘They are totally oblivious to the fact that in any other circumstance they would not be friends.’   Handled by Charles and Jama Hedgecoth, the zoo’s owners and founders, the three friendly giants appear to have have no comprehension of their animal differences.  ‘Baloo and Shere Khan are very close,’ says Diane.

‘That is because they rise early, and as Leo is a lion, he likes to spend most of the day sleeping.  ‘It is wonderful and magical to see a giant American Black Bear put his arm around a Bengal and then to see the tiger nuzzle up to the bear like a domestic cat. ‘When Leo wakes up the three of them mess around for most of the day before they settle down to some food.’  

Baloo the bear, Leo the lion and Shere Khan the tiger

Larking about: Noah’s Ark owner Charles Hedgecoth enjoys a visit with Baloo and Shere Khan


Surprisingly for three apex predators with the power to kill with a single bite or swipe of their paw, they are very relaxed around each other.  ‘They eat, sleep and play together,’ said Jama.  ‘As they treat each other as siblings they will lie on top of each other for heat and simply for affection.  ‘At the moment they are getting used to their new habitat.  ‘Shere Khan is being quite reticent about the move, but Baloo, the bear is very good at leading him on and making him feel comfortable and safe.’   Explaining that the three ‘brothers’ have always seemed to share a unique bond, Charles said: ‘Noah’s Ark is their home and they could not possibly be separated from each other.  ‘You just have to remember who you’re dealing with when you are with them though.  ‘It’s when you forget that these fellows are wild animals that you get yourself in trouble.’   The trio’s new habitat cost an estimated 15,000 and had to be constructed carefully, in order to accommodate its occupants.  Jama said: ‘The clubhouse had to be very sturdy for the guys, because they all sleep in it together,’    She added: ‘We had to include a creek, because the tiger and the bear both like to be in water.’  

Baloo the bear and Leo the lion

Close: The animals treat each other as siblings and even lie on top of each other to share warmth and affection

 

More videos in Youtube. Enjoy!

還給我一個香港

還給我一個香港

不知道香港現在變得這麼的不濟,污染的情況竟然是無日無之,政府部門則各自為政,互相推卸責任問題一拖再拖。

看畢新聞透視報導的香郊河流被豆腐廠嚴重污染的情況後,我更政府部門的軟弱。政府經常透過各大傳媒去推廣不同的公民教育,數目之多可說是世界之冠。最近又新出了叫人不要燒煙火,叫人有山火時不要行山這等近於多餘的宣傳。

不斷的叫人不要做這做那,但對不守法的卻採取縱容的態度。從特首,各問責官員以致整個公務員團隊都應加以反省。一向不喜歡批評的我,已被最近的高鐵事件,豬流感注射疫苗,議員集體辭職等問題弄得很厭煩了。

請還給我一個平靜的香港吧!

亞當的非常任務

亞當的非常任務

世界上最細小的雀鳥叫蜂鳥,英語是 Hummingbird,humming 是以牠拍翼時發出的聲音,所以稱牠為 Hummingbird。中文的命名卻更為貼切,因為蜂鳥除了拍翼的頻率與蜜蜂相似,加上體型細小,並且以採花蜜為主的,將牠名為蜂鳥我認為中文的名稱更有深度。但蜜蜂為甚麼叫蜜蜂?又是一更高深的學問。

聖經記載神造人是要人管理及看守衪所造的美地,其中一頂工作是要為各樣走獸及飛鳥起命。一向看這經文都是沒有太多的思考,理所當然的視之為很容易的事。想深一層,要為這麼多動物命名絕非簡單之事。

相信亞當的智慧必定比我們為高,他沒有接受任何的教育,在被造後不久已能完成這非常任務。今天的人往往自以為自己比先人見多識廣,以前的人是原始落後。思想亞當在與受造時已有的智慧,與今天的我們相比,其實差距甚遠。